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The problem of sexual shame

We have evolved collectively to be in tune with and highly compatible with the problems associated with the lack of shyness on the subject of sex: with a degenerate culture everything seems to go in it, where the prevailing framework is often clear and overly obvious, and where some people are severely affected by Unwanted and hostile attention by others.

It may seem somewhat strange, or even lenient, to raise the problem of shame or sexual shame, i.e. discussing the severe mental suffering caused by embarrassment about what our desires and bodies are, a sense of physical acceptance, disgust from the soul, and terror in thinking that our sexual thoughts will be discovered and judged .

These may seem issues that we cannot genuinely worry about since the era of the Top Hats or at least the 1960s revolutions receded. The peril around the topic of sex appears to lie entirely with the obscene ending with the downside it shows.

In fact, sexual shame did not go far, because it is considered a psychological problem, not a political or religious one.

The ability and ability to express ourselves sexually with confidence and happiness, and our ability to say what we want, to ask about it without embarrassment and quickly by leaving the situations in which we are being insulted, all of these are tremendous psychological accomplishments for one. It is also generally available only to those who have enjoyed very supportive and emotionally developed early environments. To be adults who are sexually reassuring requires that, going back, the departure of others will leave an acceptable feeling to ourselves: enjoying a feeling that our bodies and functions were natural and good things, that we will not be evil or commit our sin by expressing ourselves with all curiosity, and that they are considered more Good idea. At the age of two, for example, we may be delighted because of the strange and wonderful presence that everyone is self-sufficient.

Sexual desire is one of the most personal and vulnerable things we advocate to express - and it exposes a person to degrees of dangerous irony. As they are in all kinds of bullying, always known, if you want to quickly destroy a person, by displaying their sexual faults, they will never have the self-confidence to challenge again. There are a few things more profound "we" than our longing for sexual intercourse, so any sense of unworthiness - any concerns about the kindness that we show, or how much we deserve or how legitimate we are - we have a certain habit of appearing in the bedroom and destroying our ability to be people Straightforward, sexually inconsistent. If we want to generalize about the subject in a barbaric way, then if there is any sense of bad about ourselves, then we will feel - with psychological imperative - and a bad feeling about ourselves and sex. The so-called sexual problems - impotence, vaginismus, lack of desire, harmful addictions - are first and foremost considered problems that lead to self-hate. As a general rule one cannot hate themselves and have a great time in bed with their partner at the same time.

To begin to fix the problem of sexual shame, it depends on the basic acceptance of the existence of the problem, and this problem can play a devastating role in our lives. We need to learn by naming and following this issue; despite the suggestions on the contrary, many of us, whether women or men, and now (as is the case at the height of the Spanish Inquisition) many people are greatly ashamed of themselves (sexually) _ Not because what we want sexually is 'bad' (which is considered harmful to someone else), but because our history tends to feel this negative about the selfishness that is in us.

Note: The Spanish Inquisition was considered in literature and popular history as an example of Catholic repression and intolerance

The primary effect of shame or sexual shame is our silence. We feel so embarrassed that we can't even talk about the things that embarrass us. So it is of great importance to boldly transform our feelings into words and search for people with a warm heart and sophisticated thinking so that we can safely acknowledge them, with our beliefs and barriers - and learn to see ourselves with an unbiased view, without making any judgments.

To take the amount of shame that we carry in our folds, we may ask ourselves during your life course some of the influential questions that we may not have pleasant spells for:

How do you feel about your body?

How sorry do you feel for the person who has sex with you?

Can anyone know something about you sexually, know you correctly correctly, and still admire you?

There is no doubt that the harmful and unbridled expression of sexual activity can be fraught with many dangers, the kind that can destroy innocent people's confidence and their lives. But there are also tremendous risks in living with an undue feeling that we are sexually perverted.

In an environment that provides care and mutual support, we limit our acceptance of our sexual activity as one of the most generous and mature works that we appreciate.

We _ ​​shy people - deserve to discover or rediscover sex, not as a region that makes us feel guilty and afraid but as an innocent region and with a deeper sense of 'fun' or some kind of entertainment, something we really deserve to have in the same way that despite early revelations to it quite the opposite, we really We deserve it to exist in our lives